Rough Draft

Okay, so I wimped out on Valentine's Day and went with our traditional wander-around-and-buy-something-on-the-road thing (instead of tearing up the floors), but, hey, I was getting the flu - it hit me while we were out, too, and we ended up going home early. The Big Lug cooked me chili for dinner (when I'm sick I get weird cravings), and then I listlessly channel surfed until an early bedtime. But I got quite a few things off my list on Friday, so the weekend wasn't a total wash. I just can't cross "pull carpet" off yet.

I might not even want to - not yet, anyway. See, if I pull the carpet in the hallway, I'll have to pull up the threshhold to the bathroom - and if I do that, I'll expose all the layers of tile there. What if we have asbestos? The Big Lug says I'm good at "troubling trouble" but this is the way I think - did I ever mention my brother is head of a big company that deals with toxic waste issues all over the world? And he warned me not to mess with that stuff? Plus, if I peel the hall, I'll want to get the crappet (you read it right) out of the bedroom, too, which is a huge project ... and then I'll want to paint, put up the new curtains, build a headboard, take the frou-frou off the current, imitation Early American furniture, and, basically, make more work than I'm willing to take on right now.

I'm already in deep with the cabinets. I actually put in the three sliders I wanted to install. Done. I turned to cross it off my list when I realized I could take one from the other cabinet (the one I installed just a week ago), put it in for the fry pans, and replace it (with the one that wouldn't fit under the stove) so that it would hold all the storage ware comfortably. More work? Yes. Frustrating? Oh, yeah. But ignore it, I won't.

I'm learning. Fixing up a house is like writing a book - you think you have a handle on the basic story, even most of the details, but no matter how much you brainstorm or even outline the work, once you actually start writing all you ever get is a really "sh*tty first draft." (John Steinbeck knows!)

That domino effect is a big part of why I haven't done this stuff in the first place (writing, too). Yet this time, surprisingly, I found myself shrugging over the drawer and pledging to get it done this week. Apparently, I'm not willing to let the required work (and patience required) stop me any more. It simply won't take that much more time and energy to just do the work.

But not today. I'm still pretty sick (recovery is more exhausting than the illness), and the Big Lug is home (I'm sneaking this blog out in pieces). Also, I worked all day yesterday and even today - I've already seen one student (this morning), talked to another on the phone (after lunch), and peeked in on my email and essays I might have to grade (none there, thank heaven). My life is a bit nuts, as usual, and I have to slow down a bit right now.

Not for too long, though. I have a taste of what can be.

I'm dying to change it into what is.